Friendly Disagreements

Opposites attract; except they don't. Sociology's look into friendships and relationships has found that the vast majority of people bond with those who are similar to themselves. This preference can extend from the superficial, such as appearance and wealth, to core similarities in values and perspective. We like people who are like us, or who we see as better than us, because they portray what we value.

But conflict inevitably arises. There is nobody out there who thinks exactly like you do, and such differences can be detrimental if carelessly dismissed. The ability to handle a disagreement in a calm, understanding manner can not only prevent damage to relationships, but perhaps allow you to find friends in places you never expected. This entry is about differing views, though; the art of telling someone they are misinformed on matters of solid fact, or coping with stubbornness, are not addressed here.

Reacting

People are self-conscious. If they have a mindset you disagree with, an improper first reaction can do a world of damage. It can be as simple as repeating their statement in the form of a question(e.g. "You think [philosophical social platform] is a good idea?"). Your initial reaction can tell another person all they need to know about your feelings on their opinion, and that can lead to a spectrum of reactions on their part. They might become hostile, defensive, or abandon their opinion entirely.

The ability to face conflicting views with interest instead of incredulity is paramount if you want to get anywhere.

Questions & Statements

If you want to get any level of understanding on someone else's point of view, the most important thing to keep in mind is that they are the spokesperson of their mindset, not you. As such, it's usually better to ask questions than make statements. If you object with an aspect of their views, ask them why it's important, instead of dismissing it as uncouth or uninformed.

Though, if you want to voice your disagreement, remember to speak for yourself. "I don't feel that this solution treats everyone fairly" is preferable to "That's stupid." Personal words and terms like "I feel," "I think," and so on, are you letting them know your side of things; typically, the only time you should be saying "You think," is when you're asking if you understand them correctly.

Emotional Heat

In a best case scenario, both parties may have gained understanding and empathy for the other's view. They may agree to disagree, or perhaps one side may even find validity in the other(That includes you).

Regrettably, the desire to be right is a powerful one. You invested in your perspective, and so did they, and adapting that can be a painful process. It's easy for hostility to ignite, and it's difficult to put out.

Preventing a conversation from becoming an argument, and stopping an argument, are conversational arts I am no expert in. Though, myself, if I notice things heating up, or offensive words start being included, I try my best to immediately extract myself. I've found that "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you," and excusing myself from the subject can keep both me and the other party from doing some serious damage.

I just feel like there are hardly any differences of opinion that are worth losing a friend over.